My love and I are extremely practical people. We are not ones to get swept away in romance. We knew for awhile that we would get married, but that it hinged on several factors. The most important being my health. I have been on disability since I started my first round of chemo. I am blessed that Medicare covers my medical expenses for the most part. However, when we get married things will not be covered 100%. We decided it was imperative that I go into remission before we got married. With my health in a capricious state I could easily bankrupt us with one bad turn.
Several friends have said that we should throw caution to the wind and that if we truly loved one another we should just get married. That's a terribly romantic idea, but not our style. We've watched friends make that sort of decision and put themselves in unnecessarily hard situations. I don't have that luxury. I can't go without medication because we ran short this month financially. We have to carefully plan everything. I take comfort in the fact that our love does not change because we are or are not engaged. We plan on being here together years from now. That does not change. I'm not going to stomp out the door if there isn't a ring on my finger in 6 months. I'm not that kind of girl.
I am blessed that my love is a slow and steady sort of person. He is not an "I'm the king of the world!" guy. Maybe he's not adventurous and enthusiastic, but I can depend on him. He goes to work every day without complaint, but still dreams and plans for the future. He's not going abandon me to fly off to a foreign country to seek his fortune. He does not need to go into the world to find something that's missing. He is most happy here with me and finds what he needs in us. I never feel like I'm holding him back. We are exactly what each other needs, and I am thankful.
So, what this comes down to is in early April I went in for a three month check up with my rheumatologist. All of my tests came out good for the first time in 5 years. We were both quite surprised and nervous. I've gone into remission before, but it didn't last. and four months later I was sick again. We waited. In July my next set of tests came out good. On July 21st my love gave me a ring. We hesitated to set a date immediately to many people's dismay. I needed 6 months of good tests before we could call this an official remission. We didn't want to give people a date just to have to change it because of bad news. We waited. September 10th I got my third set of good tests back and we set out date. October 8th, 2011.
It was worth the wait.
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